My Manifesto of Motherhood

manifesto-1As yet another dear friend waits with bated breath for the arrival of her precious little girl, I lay here reminded. Oh, am I reminded. In fact, I should be sleeping peacefully for two hours already, but the memories keep rolling over me. I have had such a wealth of love and experience in my journey as “Mom.”

  • Was I the perfect mom? Not a chance.
  • Do I deserve a trophy for “MomAwesomeness”? (Ooooh, wouldn’t that be nice?! Is there even such a thing?)  No, I’m afraid there will always be someone more awesome.
  • Was I real? Definitely.
  • Did I do my best with what I knew at the time? Absolutely!

If only I could relive those early years with the wealth of knowledge, wisdom, and the healthy dose of ‘perspective’ that I now possess. I’m not ready for teenagers to leave home and head to college! I’ve finally mastered the art of raising toddlers, managing homework, and wading through the hormonal years.

So, my dear friends, before the passion lifts and I fall into a dreamless sleep, here’s what I’m brewing about. If I were to turn back the clock and start the MOM-journey again, this is what I would say. This is what I would promise. This is what I believe about parenting… Read more

Words of Life to a Pregnant Woman (part 1)

This past weekend, I had the privilege of attending a friend’s wedding, a delightful collection of amazing people from nations all around the globe. It was a beautiful, international celebration!

While there, I sat for a while and chatted with my friend, Puleng, who is currently 38 weeks pregnant. She’s gorgeous! This lovely, ebony beauty from the Dominion of Lesotho. She affectionately calls herself a Lesotho princess, and I wholeheartedly agree with her.

She started to tell me how difficult it’s been to prepare for this new baby. The waves of fear rolling over both her and husband have been suffocating. And they’re getting it from all sides―not only from doctors who are obliged to tell them what could go wrong but also from well-meaning acquaintances who share their personal horror stories.

Please, people, don’t do this! It is not ok to scare the life out of a new mommy until she’s paralyzed at the thought of the impending birth. Seriously?! How is that even helpful?

So, before I hear this from yet ONE MORE woman, here are my thoughts on “WHAT NOT TO SAY TO A PREGNANT WOMAN.” Read more

My Ode to Adeline

Have you ever considered…

  • Why is it that we procrastinate in telling people how much they mean to us?
  • Why do we wait until someone precious to us is dying, or about to die, before we honour them for the role they’ve played in our lives?
  • Why not tell them in the moment, or when we think about them?
  • What is it that makes us wait and wait and wait?

I recently had the sobering realization that I’d waited too long to tell a dear ‘mother’ in my life how much she really meant to me. Adeline Blumer was an amazing woman who impacted the lives of so MANY people around her, and my life immensely. She fought a long battle with cancer, and she was courageous, brave, and beautiful to the very end.

In 1988, I had the privilege of becoming the piano teacher for their four energetic and talented children, a privilege that lasted for over a decade. I was in their home on a weekly basis, and I journeyed with them through many of life’s landmarks, both theirs and mine.

Here are some excerpts of a conversation that I recently had with Angi Greene, Adeline’s eldest daughter. Everyone knew that the cancer had taken its toll on Adeline’s body, and her days on earth were numbered.  The photos on Facebook were heartbreaking, and I just couldn’t shake the urgency to tell Adeline how much I valued her role in my life. Read more